when people reach middle age, they meet more and more people, but their circles become smaller and smaller. Friends who once talked for a long time and said everything eventually disappeared into the sea of people, which is inevitably sad. But when I read Jia Pingwa's book recently, I saw a sentence that was suddenly a little relieved: "it's actually a good thing to be separated from your friends." When you reach middle age and have fewer friends, it also means that you have found the focus of your life. There are fewer wine boards, but life is better. Zhihu blogger @ Jingfeng Paper kite Shared a personal experience. After six o'clock every morning, the blogger will get up and drive his wife to work, and then go to work by himself. Because he likes to write, after work in the evening, he will hide in his room, write on major websites, or pick up a few commercial copywriters to earn some extra money. In fact, his daytime income is not very low, even if he does not write part-time, he can still live on. But the blogger said that when you have someone you want to protect, you always want to do your best to give them the best. The person the blogger wants to protect most is his family. He didn't want his parents to be afraid to spend money when they got sick, so he didn't dare to tell him. He also hopes that through efforts, children can be sent to better schools and receive better education. I was deeply touched by the last words of the blogger: "I also want to drink and chat with my friends and stay out all night, but I don't have the time. I have to do something. I still silently bless the happiness of my friends and applaud their success. But someone at home is waiting for me, and those friends who are separated will not be sent away. I'm sorry. " Half the slope of life, you will eventually understand that family is more important than anyone else. A responsible and responsible middle-aged man is by no means drunk in the liquor bureau every day and wakes up at home. But to reduce socializing as much as possible and spend time with the family. Lin Yutang said, "there are nothing more than four things in a happy life: one is to sleep in your own bed; the second is to eat food cooked by your parents; the third is to listen to your lover's love talk; and the fourth is to play games with your children." Fewer friends, fewer wine bureaus, family sitting idle, amiable lights, is the greatest happiness in the world. Fewer friends, but a better relationship. There is a psychological study concluded that at the end of a person's life, no more than 10 friends remain with him. But in real life, we spend a lot of time socializing useless. When you reach middle age, you should understand that it is enough to have three or five friends who can dig your heart out in this life. When I was in college, I found that my father didn't have many friends. It is those people who drink and chat at every party, go fishing, brag and play cards. At that time, I was very fond of making friends, and I would make a new friend every now and then. Therefore, I was full of disdain for my father. I always felt that his circle was too narrow, that he stayed with the same few people every day, and that life was too boring. Until once, something happened at home and needed money. The uncles, who usually had a good time with their father, took the initiative to lend money to their father, although they did not have much money. It was only after that that I suddenly realized that although my father did not have many friends, he had a strong relationship with each other. I believe that when my father was young, like me, he was surrounded by many friends, but these friends were like fallen leaves after autumn, which drifted away as soon as the wind blew. When people reach middle age, they face the double pressure of work and family, and their energy is limited. A smaller circle is not a bad thing, and you can use your limited energy to maintain your own small circle. Actor Shen Teng once said: "all friends after the age of 20 need to take the time to understand. After the precipitation of time, the friend who can leave five is already the winner in life. " After middle age, friends want quality, not quantity. Although the circle is small, it is good to be sincere. The world is quiet, but people are more mature. There is an issue in the Roundtable that talks about solitude and mentions Einstein. Einstein had a little problem that even his wife couldn't stand it. He often said hello without calling, and he disappeared from home for a few days for no reason, and no one could find him. Where did he go after he left home? He may be lying on the grass staring at the stars in the night sky in a daze, or he may be in a boat on the lake, thinking about his physics problems. In short, every once in a while, Einstein needed this kind of alone time of his own. Finally, the host Dou Wentao said: "being alone makes you great. Many great achievements in history have been thought out in this moment of solitude. " When young, like the lights and wine, like the hustle and bustle, people to middle age, more enjoy the quiet alone. Chen Daoming said in the interview with Yang Lan that he hates socializing and likes to be alone. I would rather sit in a chair and read quietly than go out to see many people. In the process of being alone, whether it is reading, or practicing calligraphy and playing the piano, it can give him physical and mental pleasure. Qian Zhongshu once said: "the prosperity outside the door is not mine." Loneliness is frustrating, silence makes people heavy, because loneliness is to bear, silence is the choice. When people reach middle age, they see clearly that life is riddled with holes, and prefer to be quiet and enjoy loneliness. Yu Hua wrote in "shouting in the drizzle": "instead of pretending to have a lot of friends, I went back to loneliness and began to live alone with the real me." The world from noisy to quiet, learning to get along with yourself is a required course of life. Being alone is a sign of a person's true maturity. ▽ MiyazakiHayao said: "Life is a train to the grave. There will be many stops along the way, and it is very difficult for anyone to accompany him from beginning to end. When the person with you wants to get out of the car, be grateful even if you don't give up, and then wave goodbye. " When you reach middle age, life is like a station, with less greeting and more parting. You have to thank the people who have appeared in your life for making your life full. You should thank yourself more, because you are your world and you are the warmth of your family. I would rather be alone than melt; I would rather be alone than against my will.

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