How to speak is not only a knowledge, but also the art of dealing with the world.
communicating with people and how to speak is not only a knowledge, but also the art of dealing with people.
when we deal with people, we may move each other because of a word, or we may lose a friendship because of inappropriate words.
in Journey to the West, it is said that "the mouth is scattered, the tongue is unhealthy", and there is an old saying that "right and wrong are only for the sake of opening more mouths, and troubles are all due to strength."
there is such a saying in Chinese folk culture: don't talk when you are poor, don't be humble.
only 10 words, but it contains profound truth. In fact, the latter half of the proverb is equally wonderful, revealing the reality of human nature.
Don't talk when you are poor
Let's first take a look at "Don't talk when you are poor", which means:
when people are in trouble and poverty, don't speak casually.
the divination of the Book of changes once said that "you don't believe what you say." if a person is in the midst of adversity, his own food and clothing cannot be solved, then no one will believe what this person says, even if it is a great truth and great knowledge.
when people are poor, they are more likely to listen and understand, rather than whistling and talking.
Zengguang Xianwen says that "the poor live in a busy city without anyone asking, and the rich have distant relatives in the mountains." not only does the poor have no interest, but even the right to speak will be invisibly "deprived".
whether they attend a gathering of friends or discuss cooperation with people, those who talk and laugh are often people who are either rich or valuable. even if there are many inadequacies in what they say, they will be forgiven by others.
so when a person is poor, try to control his mouth, which will leave a good impression, if eloquent, it is likely to arouse the resentment of others.
humble position do not persuade people
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there is a saying that "people speak lightly".
I have a relative who has a very good temper, but he has a bad habit of meddling.
for example, when a neighbor quarrels, he goes to be a peacemaker, and he gets involved in a quarrel between husband and wife, and as a result, everyone thinks he is in the way.
when he was having a wedding, he sat at a table with several relatives who were out in business, chatting, and he ran away with a red face. Later he heard that he had made his old habit again.
people say that business is lively, and he follows the reasoning. He doesn't know which sentence has offended the other party and makes people laugh at him as a bird. He is so poor that he knows nothing.
if a person does not have any social status and humble status, then do not advise others, because others may not believe what you say.
just like many parents, they always persuade their children to become dragons and phoenixes, but they are neither dragons nor phoenixes, so their children naturally won't listen.
to do something, you must first have the ability to make achievements, and then you will have the strength to speak out in order to be recognized by others.
if you are ordinary, what you say will be regarded as bragging, and it is difficult to impress others.
the saying "Don't talk when you are poor, don't persuade people to be humble" actually has the second half of the sentence, which is even more wonderful and intriguing, that is, "if you have a little strength to bear the burden, do not find relatives in adversity."
take a rest and bear the weight
this sentence means that if you are weak, don't do anything beyond our reach.
there is an idiom that "mantis blocks the car". In fact, many people lack their own ability, but they always want to occupy a high position, resulting in a mess of things and putting themselves in danger.
getting ahead of yourself will make others laugh and embarrass yourself.
in the era of competition, everyone should accumulate energy and be a hidden dragon in order to meet dignitaries in life and achieve a career.
Don't find relatives in trouble
"Don't find relatives when you are in trouble" is more realistic, reflecting the warmth of human feelings.
relatives walk around every day to get in touch with each other, and it doesn't matter to help each other, but often asking for help from relatives will make them feel that "you are a poor relative" and become more and more estranged.
when you encounter difficulties, you should find ways to solve them by yourself, and try not to ask for help as much as possible.
for example, when Fan Jin encountered difficulties at that time, his wife went to seek help from his relatives, but few people were willing to lend a helping hand.
later, Fan Jin's relatives came to congratulate and take the initiative to take the initiative to ask for warmth. Fan Jin suddenly changed from a poor scholar whom everyone disliked into a sweet cake that everyone flattered. This truth reflects the reality of human nature.
as the saying goes, "Don't talk when you are poor, don't be humble." and the latter half of its sentence, "take a little rest and bear a heavy load, do not find relatives in adversity" are the personal experience of the ancients.
although it seems impersonal, it is a must-know knowledge in our daily life.
after fully understanding and understanding, you will find that you have to rely on yourself to do everything. If you have grown ambition, you will naturally do everything smoothly.