If the heart cares, the sky is dark, the heart is open, the wind is light and the clouds are light.
ID: duhaoshu
there are always such people in life:
take trifles seriously, compete with innocuous people, stubbornly drill into the tip of their horns, turn themselves into twists and turn their lives into chicken feathers.
Zhou Guoping said:
"A lot of pain in life comes from blind competition."
always cling to a little thing, let oneself tired, but also missed other colorful scenery, too much loss outweighs the gain.
Don't be too "competitive" in your life.
Don't get angry with the villain, because it's not worth it
among all living beings, everyone's cognitive level and self-cultivation connotation are very different.
Guo Degang has a saying that is very vivid: "the waves are big, I don't know what kind of seafood to blow up."
people in this life, see thousands of people, say ten thousand kinds of words, what kind of villains will encounter, what kind of bad things will see.
if you care about everything and everyone is angry, I'm afraid it will be a painful day.
there is a good saying:
"if you want to become a big tree, do not contend with the grass; the general has a sword, but does not cut the ants."
I have heard such a story from netizens:
on a trip to the suburbs, halfway up a famous mountain, I met a monk speaking Buddhist sutras.
the monks dress simply and speak very simply, teaching people how to maintain peace of mind and avoid anxiety.
passers-by nodded frequently with relish.
but suddenly a young man with yellow hair appeared and ridiculed the monk loudly: "nonsense, it's not to cheat money." he held up the milk tea in his hand and threw it at the monk.
Milk tea hit the monk right on the body, and the dirty liquid dripped down the broad monk's clothes.
the monk looked calm and continued his lecture without even wiping it, as if unaffected.
A bystander thought the monk would fly into a rage and fight back. it was strange to see each other quietly, so she asked the monk, "Master, aren't you angry?"
the monk smiled: "Why should I be angry?"
"that man spilled dirt on you, and he was not bad at it." The aunt looked aggrieved.
as the saying goes: "often compete with the same, do not argue with fools."
A quarrel will not solve the problem; if there is a fight, the other party will not raise awareness.
wasting your time, ruining your mood, and making yourself a fool, the loss outweighs the gain.
can't you see that the dog barks at everyone, but no one barks at the dog?
Lincoln once said:
instead of arguing with the dog and being bitten by him, it is better to let him go first, otherwise even if he is killed, it will not cure your bite scar.
your life is so complicated and noisy that you really don't have to waste your energy on people who don't care, it's better to walk away.
Don't reason with your lover, because it hurts feelings
the person who has been with him the longest in his life, apart from himself, is the one who walks through the ravines and dangerous shoals together, experiencing chicken feathers and pots and pans every day, which we call "lovers".
it's just that one of the stupid mistakes we often make is to be tolerant and polite outside, but insist on fighting for right and wrong when we get home.
little do you know that when you reason at home and fight for right or wrong with your lover, you lose, and you win.
Yang Jiang once asked Qian Zhongshu, "Why do you give way to me every time you quarrel?"
Qian Zhongshu replied:
"because you are mine, even if you win the argument, what can you do?" If I win the truth, lose my feelings, and lose you, I will lose my whole life. "
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neighbor Xiaomei is a gentle and romantic girl who is planning her wedding and the wedding date is set on New year's Day. She was supposed to be a gorgeous bride-to-be, but she was not happy.
it turns out that Xiao Mei's husband is a man of science and technology, and her logical thinking is very rigorous. If there are any differences between the two, her husband will quote the classics and put forward a lot of reasons, hoping to convince Xiao Mei.
for the decoration of the new house, Xiao Mei wants to lay wood floors, but her husband thinks that wood floors are not practical, sanitation and maintenance are very troublesome, and they are not as affordable as floor tiles.
then go on and on about the reason, from the properties of the plate to the warm structure of the ground.
Xiaomei wants to eat western food on the top floor of the central square and enjoy the rain. However, my husband counted how dangerous it is to travel on rainy days, how deep the water will be if he has to cross several underpass bridges.
Xiao Mei, who is extremely depressed, just hopes that her husband can coax her.
between husband and wife, there is not so much right and wrong, and there is no need to convince each other to prove themselves right.
learn to accommodate each other, and you will gain more.
home is not a court; a lover is not an opposing lawyer.
Don't use your tongue to embrace the problems that can be solved, and don't use reason to solve the problems that can be solved by feelings.
it must be warm tolerance, not cold truth, that can protect a family that moves forward through wind and rain, flourish, and can support close lovers to share weal and woe, and white heads are not separated.
Don't let yourself be the "always right" loner for the rest of your life.
Don't compete with yourself because you don't want to.Meaning
there is a question on the Internet: "what kind of experience is being obsessed with too much?"
one of the answers is: "it's not easy to have a fire in your heart."
A lot of troubles in life come from refusing to let yourself go and wrestling with yourself endlessly.
very often, when you compete with yourself, you expect too much from yourself, stubbornly thinking that you can do better and cannot accept yourself who is powerless, so draw a circle in your heart as a prison and trap yourself.
Wu Xin once said frankly in a program:
"the past three years have actually been very hard. I have been competing with myself and feel that I can do a lot of things."
nine times out of ten things go wrong in life. Don't be too serious, don't be too demanding, accept your imperfections, accept life's imperfections.
know yourself, accept yourself, let yourself go, and you will naturally have a different sea and sky.
Zhang Wenju, a master of calligraphy, dreamed of becoming a writer when he was young. To this end, he practices writing every day, writes constantly, and then sends manuscripts to different publishers.
although he worked hard, the manuscript was never hired.
Zhang Wenju suddenly realized that maybe he was really not fit to be a writer. So he decisively gave up writing, began to practice calligraphy, and finally became a famous calligrapher.
Professor Li Meijin said:
in fact, life is not difficult, just don't compete with yourself, always use the ideal me to teach the real me.
living a life is an Enron with a long flow of water, not a tense confrontation. If the heart is concerned, the sky is dark, and the heart is open, the wind is light and the clouds are light.
I am glad that Zhang Wenju is not blindly serious. Although he has one less writer, he has one more calligrapher.
Life is full of scenery, if you feel exhausted, then change direction, turn around, maybe it is the willow and the flowers are bright.
Don't live too much in this life
whether you are happy or not depends not on how much wealth you have, but on how free your heart is.
Qian Zhongshu wrote this paragraph in his book:
take a bath, look at a flower, eat a meal, if you feel happy, it is not all because the bath is clean, the flowers bloom well, or the dishes are to your taste, mainly because you have nothing on your mind.
people in this life, do not live too "seriously", let go of obsession, the heart is not in the way, not disturbed by the noise of the world, not bound by the fame and wealth of the world.
not being angry with villains, he is refreshed;
if you don't reason with your lover, you will have a strong family and affection.
Don't compete with yourself and be at ease.
as Zeng Guofan said, "if we do not welcome the future, we will not be mixed at that time, and we will not fall in love in the past."
for the rest of my life, there is nothing outside my heart, watching the flowers bloom, leaving or staying unintentionally, waiting for the flowers to fall.